Hello once again from Shanghai! I'm back in China after two weeks south of the equator. I had an incredible time in New Zealand--it is stunning, the scenery is as I imagined and even more spectacular in person than just on pictures. I promise more stories to come. Tonight, I just wanted to write about a phenomenon that I've experienced today.
I consider myself to be fairly adventurous and willing to jump into new things. I would also say that I am fairly intelligent, quick learner, and quick on my feet. But living in a country where I absolutely do not know the language is incredibly debilitating! I think overwhelming is a good work to describe my current feelings. I just got back to my apartment after a day of walking around Shanghai. I have noticed in this country and others, that people will just come up to you and begin a conversation with me regardless of if I respond in their language. I feel rude that I don't know any Mandarin and that bothers me. Today I had to basically walk away from a gentleman who decided he needed to sit almost on my lap and discuss with me something, all in Chinese even as I was saying "I don't speak Chinese" and was looking at him blankly. Similar situations happened to me while in Florence and Rome. And today, a woman and school girls approached me too. People will just yell out "hello" to get my attention and then try to get me to buy something or come into their restaurant. I understand the allure for an English speaker like me who knows no Chinese-I want to go somewhere where something, anything is familiar and "safe", so if a place speaks a little English or has a picture/translated menu, I'll eat there!!! Understanding spoken language is so key to my existence, I don't realize how much I need/value it until I can't use it anymore. Of course there is body language too, some people smile at me and I'll smile back. But some people just want to catch your eye to try and sell you something which makes me not want to talk to anyone or look at anyone. It's overwhelming. People here don't have as much as a person bubble as they do in the US. Granted if I had 22, 999,999 neighbors just in my hometown, I may not have a bubble as well but it is definitely different. What amazes me is how much everyone exists in their own world-maybe everyone has to look out for themselves in order to just survive the subway.
I'll admit I"m tired which makes me more vulnerable to stress, noise, and lots of people. But today's occurances will definitely be on my mind as I try to venture off. I don't want to be afraid walking somewhere that I'll get bothered or afraid to sit down because I will get approached. I promise I won't let it keep me hidden forever, it is just part of the adventure. And my goal is to learn Mandarin, at least a bit while I am China. My goal is to make it enough that I don't walk through stores thinking "please don't ask me anything" as I feel so rude and unintelligent not knowing how to respond. Tomorrow my goal is to learn please, yes and no.
It's a start at least.
Love.
Ps. more pictures have been posted: https://picasaweb.google.com/srweir122/NZ2AndSydney?authuser=0&authkey=Gv1sRgCKzlzMvGh6G8ngE&feat=directlink
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